Overview

Eliza has opinions. About your form. Your supplements. Your magnesium. And she would really like to share them with you, whether you asked or not.

When her girlfriend Riley suggests they join a gym, Eliza prepares the way she prepares for everything — with a spreadsheet, a disinfectant holster, and a fourteen-page grievance document she hasn't needed yet but feels good having. What follows is a series of increasingly spectacular incidents involving unsolicited expertise, a torn pair of sweatpants, one very patient gym manager, and a viral social media campaign that makes Eliza briefly famous for all the wrong reasons.

Riley finds most of this charming. She also finds her girlfriend regularly over her knee, bare bottom up, offering her charity donations as evidence of good character while Riley's hand makes a very convincing counter-argument.

Some lessons have to be learned more than once. Some have to be learned in front of mirrors with an audience.

A sapphic erotic comedy about knowing everything except when to stop talking.

Contains: F/F romance, spanking, steamy scenes, and one woman's heroic commitment to helping people who did not ask to be helped.